I'll be a runaway
by Karen Winchester
Summary: S13. After a hunt goes wrong, Sam leaves the bunker to protect Jack from Dean. What will happen when he finds himself in trouble? Hurt!Sam Guilty!Dean Protective!Dean I don'T own anything, just my crazy imagination :)
1. Chapter 1

I'll be a runaway

"You're freaking out again  
'Cause all your fears  
Remind you another dream has come undone  
You feel so small and lost like you're the only one  
You wanna scream 'cause you're  
Desperate  
You want a reason to keep believing  
That someday you're gonna see the light  
You're in the dark  
There's no one left to call  
And sleep's your only friend  
It's your life, it's time you face it "

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 _Present time…_

Dean heard the sound of his heavy breathing as everything that surrounded him was a dead silence. He had been looking for Sam and Jack for _two freaking weeks_ now, however he had found nothing but frustration and the irresistible desire to punch his brother until he passed out. He was not even kidding.

How could the kid had done that? Sam had betrayed him, leaving every single thing he could track him with. His cellphone was laying on the table right next to him, and the laptop was in his room. Little did he know, Sam had never seen him put a tracker devise on it. Apparently, he was wrong. His kid brother was smarter than he believed he was.

"Dammit Sammy, I hope you are safe or I'll freaking kick your ass" said aloud

He had not been comfortable being around Jack and Sam knew it too damn well. Their last hunt had ended pretty badly as Jack, clearly out of control, sent Sam flying towards a cement wall, knocking him out and giving him a good concussion.

He remembered he screamed at him, right before he ran towards his unconscious little brother, trying to wake him up. Jack must have told Sam about his threats to kill him if he did one more mistake, since three days later both of them were gone and now unreachable.

Cass was dead, and so was his mother and Crowley. God was missing, clearly giving a damn about them anymore. Since he went to church with Amara he vanished and never came back.

He had no one to ask for help this time. He could not trust other hunters or angels, since they wanted Jack's head on a stick. He could understand them though. Jack was the Devil's son, and it was matter of time before he would turn evil. He was human, and according to Sam that side would win in him, however he had a dark side as well.

He could still recall the fight he had had with his brother, the very last fight that had. God, he wished he hadn't said those words to him...

He said those words to his brother because he knew it would hurt him. That was the truth. Sam was getting too involved with Jack's feelings, and he had to make him see what they were dealing with.

Sure, he could have found another way to say it, but he knew himself. The loss of a loved one was never easy to him, and being all alone with his brother again was harder than ever. He had had a friend, a mother, and brother, but now he was alone. Dean had lost everyone he loved.

The elder Winchester made a pit stop in the kitchen to grab a cold beer, knowing that he could not do anything. It was night already and the clues to find his brother and the freaking devil's son was getting colder every day.

If Jack had ran away on his own, Sam would have quoted himself. He would have said, "People don't just disappear, Dean. They just stop looking for them".

Maybe he was right, maybe he wasn't. Who knew? What if he couldn't find them until it was too late? What if Sammy was dead by then? He would be damned if he let that happen to him. No way.

Dean left the kitchen and headed towards his room. When was the last time he actually slept? He did not remember, and now he wished he didn't have to. His father had given him one job, and it was look after his little brother. When had he failed his only mission? When had he stopped being the big brother Sam needed?

Rage and violence were pumping through his veins, and he could not think about anything else than killing the little 'angel'. He hated himself. He let Sam down, and there was nothing he could do about it.

As he fell asleep, the words he had said to Sam came back to torment him, leaving only guilt and sorrow in him.

Dean Winchester was screwed.

 **TBC...?**

 **Author's note** **: Hey guys! I dreamt with Sam and Dean having a fight, and this fic came to my mind. Should I keep writing it?**

 **Please review** **J**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

 _"There aren't any rules to running away from your problems. No checklist of things to cross off. No instructions. Eeny, meeny, pick a path and go. Your problems always find you though. The problems to catch up with you again before you know it. And then it's time to run again._

 _It Feels like I leave behind a little bit of who I was in each house I've left empty. Scattering pieces of me in towns all over the place. A trail of crumbs dotting the map from everywhere I've left to everywhere we go. And they don't make any pictures when I connect dots. They are random like the stars littering the sky at night."_

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Sacramento, California.

Present time...

Sam booked himself and Jack to the cheapest motel he could find. Truth is, he was running out of money and would have to do something about it soon. Jack didn't know how to 'earn' money the way he did, the way Dean told him to, so he was the adult responsible to do it now. Jack could be dangerous sometimes, but he was also very innocent and needed a fatherly figure, since Castiel was dead and was not coming back ever again. He was not dumb though, he knew how badly he had messed up his relationship with Dean when he decided to leave his home in Kansas to protect Jack from his older brother. It had been for the best.

"You okay, Sam?" asked Jack with a curious look on his face.

"Yeah, I am fine. It's been a long drive, that's all" answered Sam, avoiding the clear subject Jack knew as well as he did.

The kid didn't say anything and entered inside the motel room with their duffel bags. Sam yawned and followed him within seconds, planning his next move.

If he could, he would drive himself and Jack unconsciously towards Dean without even thinking once about it, because that was the only place where he felt safe. Dean was more than a brother to him; Dean was his home, his everything. He had been and still was the father and mather he had never had while growing up. Now he understood what Dean had gone through when he raised Sam when they were just little kids. He had Jack's life on his hands and it was a pretty heavy task to do alone.

Sam took his new cellphone out of his pocket and almost dialed Dean's number again, however, two seconds later he turned it off, threw it to the bed and covered his face with his hands. He wanted to get drunk and pass out, but he could not do it. Jack was hungry, and if Sam didn't fetch him some hamburgers, Jack would, exposing himself to the demons and angels that wanted to use to use him as a weapon.

"I'm gonna get you something to eat. You want another hamburger?" asked Sam, already guessing the answer. God, the kid had Dean's taste in food, and even his music taste sometimes. It was not fair. It felt like a constant slap to his face, a constant reminder of what he had done to his brother. He had let him down. He had ran away like he always did. Dean was right after all. He'd never changed, even when he believed he did so.

"Yeah, with fries and ketchup, lots of ketchup" said Jack while smiling at him.

"Kay, just stay here and don't open the door to anyone. I'll be back in ten" said Sam.

Jack nodded as he turned the TV on, going straight to the cartoons channels. Scooby Doo was on, his favorite show.

Sam smiled as he heard the sweet sound of Jack's laugh. Jack was so similar to him. He wanted to be good, he wanted to keep that innocence despite the darkness within him. He could still choose the right path, he could still do the right thing, and Sam could teach him how to avoid being used and misunderstood. He had to, and that was the part that Dean didn't understand. Dean had said something to him a few days before he decided to leave, somerhing that hurt him more than expected. He didn't know if he really meant it or not, but deep down he knew it was the truth, at least to him. He had never wanted to believe it, and the consequences of the paths he had taken were the proof of that choice.

 _Flashback..._

 ** _Two weeks and three days before_**

 _Dean was driving towards Lebanon with Sam sitting next to him and Jack on the backseat._

 _"Sam, I'm so-"_

 _"Don't talk to him, don't even look at him, Jack. You hurt him" said Dean spitting rage with each spoken word._

 _"Dean, it was an accident" responded Sam, still with his eyes closed and dried blood on the side of his head. God, he felt like a planet had fell on him._

 _"Don't defend him, Sam. You were the one who brought Jack to the shifter hunt. Instead of killing the freaking thing, he sent you towards a cement wall. He is dangerous, and I warned you about that!"_

 _None of them answer, still hearing Dean's harsh words inside their heads. It had been a single mistake that could have killed Sam, but it was still a mistake. The kid thought of them as friends. Why Dean could not understand that?_

 _Once they were home, Jack went straight to his room and Sam went to the kitchen to grab some ice. He never heard Dean following him, or unexpected punch he gave him on his shoulder._

 _"Hey, dude! What's wrong with you?" asked Sam, pissed, hurt and surprised_

 _"I should be the one asking that, don't you think?"_

 _"Dean-"_

 _"Don't 'Dean' me, Sam. That thing is Lucifer's freaking son. You know that sooner or later we will have to put a bullet through his skull. He could have killed you, dammit!" yelled Dean, worried sick about his little brother._

 _"Listen, okay? We can teach him how to control his powers. He may look like an adult, but he is still a kid. He doesn't know what real danger means yet, and you can see that as well as I do" explained Sam, tired of having the same conversation with his brother every day._

 _There was a moment of silence, followed second later with Dean's honest answer..._

 _"I see where this is going. You are seeing yourself in this kid, right? You are too blind to see that he is pure evil! He cannot be saved!"_

 _"You chose to save me every time, even when there was no hope to fight with, Dean! The things I did... The people I hurt along the way... You'd be lying if you say that you forgot what I've done."_

 _"I haven't, but you were trying to do the right thing. You never chose to have demon blood, you never chose to do what the angels and demons wanted you to do!"_

 _"Neither did him, Dean. You don't know what it feels to know, to feel the darkness pumping through your veins. You don't know what it feels to fight every single day to keep breathing when everyone wants your head on a stick!"_

 _"I don't, and I don't want to know, okay? I thought you left those dark spots behind, but apparently, you are the same stupid kid who thinks that can save the world. Why won't you see the truth for once in your life, Sam? You can't save anyone from their destiny! You could not see the difference between the good and the bad before, and now you're making the same mistake! I am giving you a fair warning though, this time I am not gonna be here to see you fail again. I'm tired of fixing your damned mistakes! The darkness was released because of you! People died because you are not entirely human, Sam! You are just like him!"_

 _Dean saw Sam's devastated look on his face, but before he could apologize, Sam left the kitchen and went to his room, closing the door and locking it with the key he owned._

 _Dean followed him and tried to open the door, but found that it was locked._

 _"Sam, open the door, dammit!" said Dean, closing his eyes as he heard his kid brother sobbing quietly, trying to keep himself together._

 _"I- I didn't mean it, Sammy. Please, open the door" begged the elder Winchester._

 _He waited for an hour, talking to him, but only the silence answered him._

 _He had said that to make him understand Jack was dangerous, but the words that followed next were not meant to be there at all. Sam was human, and he was the person he loved the most. Not his mom, dad or even Bobby. Sam was his entire life, and bringing the past had destroyed the kid. He was so freaking stupid!_

 _Dean gave up and walked towards the kitchen. He grabbed four cold beers and went straight to his room. It was going to be a long night._

 _It was five in the morning and could barely walk, but Dean made it to Jack's room with a gun on his hand. The thing was sleeping, clearly not aware of his presence._

 _"If you hurt my brother one more time, I-I will use this gun on you, you hear me you son of a bitch! I should have been the one to find you in the first place. I should have killed you when I had the chance" said Dean, angry and very drunk._

 _He left Jack's room, not aware of one little detail. Jack had heard every single word he said._

 **TBC...**

 **Author's note: Here's the second part guys...**

 **Should I keep writing?**

 **Please review to let me know what you think :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

 _"Somehow, we'll find it. The balance between whom we wish to be and whom we need to be. But for now, we simply have to be satisfied with who we are."_

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 **Portland, Oregon**.

 _Two days later_...

Dean Winchester, or 'Agent Thomas Johnson' that day, entered into the first bar he found. He had spent all day asking people if they had seen a tall guy with shaggy brown hair, and a young 'man' with blonde hair (And evilness within him if he could).

He was carrying one picture of Sam and one photo of Jack, the one the cop took when she found him. No one saw them, no one seemed to be able to remember a weird event happening around the area, no matter where he asked. Where the hell were they?

John Winchester trained them to be good at hiding, but Dean had to recognize that Sam had won this biggest trophy this time. He had vanished from Earth, his little brother was just... gone.

"What can I get you?" asked the bar waitress, who had long brown hair, blue eyes and a kind smile on her young face.

"Whisky, please" said Dean while rubbing his eyes with his hands. He needed to sleep. He needed his brother to be safe and sound with him.

The lady disappeared, and within a couple of minutes minutes, she brought the order. One whisky turned into more, and when Dean realized he was getting too drunk, called the waitress and gave her his credit card.

"Hey, I saw that man" pointed the girl.

Dean looked at her confused, but when he looked down at the table, saw the picture of Sam.

"You did? When?" asked the elder sibling, suddenly feeling alert

"Four days ago, maybe? He was with a younger guy, he looked like he was in his early twenties, or so I could tell. They drank some beers and left. Are you looking for them?" asked the girl

"Umm... Yeah, why do you ask that?"

"I don't know... The taller man seemed nervous to me. He was looking everywhere, like someone was watching him. Have they done something bad?"

"I don't know yet, but I'll find out eventually. Very soon" thought Dean

The elder hunter took the picture of Jack out of his pocket and showed it to her. The girl recognized the smaller 'man' as well.

"Listen..."

"Hannah"

"I will ask you something if you don't mind, Hannah. I will give you a card with my number. If you see them again, please call me. I need to find these men as soon as possible"

"Sure" said the young girl

He smiled at her as he walked away from the bar, feeling how hope started to rise again within his chest. For some weird reason, the headaches and difficulty to breathe had gone away, like they had never been theren in the first place.

If Sam and Jack had been there four days ago, they could not be too far from him. He knew his kid brother, and Sam was not like him. Sam needed his beauty sleep to drive for many hours, so he liked to stop to book a motel room sooner than he would.

"You can't run away from me, kid" thought Dean, walking towards the Impala. If he were Sam, where would he go next?

Dean smiled as he drove away. He was going to California.

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 **California**

Sam looked from his computer to the bed nearest to the wall. Jack was waking up, and had tears on his face.

"Jack, what's wrong?" asked Sam worried about the kid.

"Nothing" said Jack, sitting on the bed, avoiding Sam's presence.

"If you want to talk about something, I am here Jack"

"It's just that... I dreamt with my mom again. She said that I had to-to be safe from the evil men that are looking for me. He said that you could protect me now" said Jack.

"I can, and I will protect you, don't worry about that" affirmed Sam

"But, you are sad. I can feel it. Since we ran away from Dean you've been sad, all because of me" lamented Jack.

"No, I am not sad. I wish he could understand you. I wish he could understand us... When you're safe and can control your powers without any sort of hesitation, we will go to him and prove him he was wrong." affirmed Sam with a smile on his face.

Jack got up from his bed, walked towards his duffel bag and grabbed some clean clothes. Apparently, he needed to bathe every single day. He wanted to be a human, so he followed Sam's instructions and 'tips' to be one. He could do it. Sam was helping him to learn how to teleport from a room to another one.

Sometimes, during the night they would practice in some abandoned building how to fight against an enemy made of mattresses, stuffed animals or wooden logs. He had improved a lot since he ran away.

Jack knew that Sam was sad, and that made him feel sad too. He wanted his friend and second fatherly figure to be happy, but he ruined everyone's lives. He got his mom killed, and his father was dead too. Would he be entirely good someday?

 **TBC...**

 **Author's note** **: Hey guys! Here's another update for y'all!**

 **Please review to let me know what you think :)**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

 _"_ _It had started to drizzle. The lamp poles cast a kaleidoscope of light dancing across the puddles in the road. The rain made Sam feel even more lost now, as if these shadowy events were invisible to the world. As if the night was cloaked in anonymity. This wasn't a peaceful rain - it was a sad one. A drizzle, which wept for the inevitable. Sam knew even if she got Alison out of this alive, the cuts on their lives had already been made, pooling the blood of consequence beneath their feet as the night dragged on. Whichever way this went, they'd have scars from this night. Scars and scabs and things which could not be spoken. And that made her feel utterly hopeless."  
― __**Adelheid Manefeldt**_ _,_ _ **Consequence**_

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Sam saw how Jack closed the bathroom door, but heard the sound of the water running ten minutes after the kid entered inside the small room.

He could not read Jack's mind, but he knew how the he felt. He knew it too well. When he was drinking demon blood, a part of him felt strong; however, deep inside he knew something was wrong. His 'human part', as he called it.

He had always known that, probably since he was just a little kid, but his mind blocked those thoughts. He could compare it to those kids who felt like they didn't belong to their families, and after many years they found out they were adopted. Something inside him had been warning him about the darkness he owned, even before he could figure out what it was all about, or even ask himself why he was the one to suffer. Maybe he was trying to protect himself from his own self, if it made any sense at all. At least for him, it did make sense. He had wanted to believe so badly that he was human that he took the wrong path with every choice he had been given.

That's why he did not tell Dean about Azazel's presence in his dream, when the damn thing showed him how it let its cursed blood fall into his mouth, or how the powers of the rest of the kids in Cold Oak really worked if they gave in. He had always felt like an abomination, a failure, like a monster that deserved to be hunted and killed. For a couple of months he could let his past go, or so he thought because of the hallucinations of Lucifer. The constant fear and punishment that were within his own mind were his best 'happy pills' to forgive himself for how many people he had hurt along with his decisions. When Castiel saved him, he came back to be the old screwed up version of himself. He let Dean rot in purgatory for an entire year, just because he thought his brother was dead, and decided to start a life with a girl he could have put in danger. He should have known better than that!

Somehow, he and his brother could manage to survive through the worst possible situations. During that year, Amelia became his safe zone, his only reason to keep living when no one else was around. Little did he know, Kevin had needed him and he failed him, as a monster would. Not only Gadreel killed him a year later. He had killed him too, even if Dean thought differently. His hands were the ones were bloody. Not Dean's ones.

The mental torture he applied to himself and still daily but unconsciously kept doing could be even more painful than the physical torture Lucifer applied on him for a hundred and eighty years in hell, or eighteen months on Earth.

Sam never heard the knock on the door, or the man who was behind it. Jack, with his wet hair and Jeans on was the one to go to the door; still ignoring of the danger he was putting himself on, just by doing it without alerting Sam about it.

"Hello Sir. I am the manager of the motel. There has been a problem with… John Smith's room payment. Is he here?" asked the man

"Umm… Yeah, he is here. Sam? Sam!"

Jack had to yell at him to call his attention. Sam followed the sound of the kid's worried voice, surprised and alert. At first, he thought that Jack was seeing something outside, like a cat or a dog. He loved them and wanted to take them along with them if he let him. However, he saw a man standing outside the door.

"Yeah, Jack? Sorry, I am just tired. What's going on?" asked the hunter, tense and palpating the gun that was hidden in between his belt and white shirt, underneath his long sleeve plaid shirt

"Mister Smith, I am sorry to bother you right now, but I am afraid that there's been a problem with the credit card you payed the room with" explained the man with a kind smile on his face.

Sam's initial thought was that he was telling the truth, but his hand was still close to his gun. He could not trust anybody. Not right now.

"Can I go there in ten minutes? I am kinda busy right now. I'll give you another credit card I have" said Sam

"I am afraid that I cannot wait, Sir. You'll have to come with me right now or pack your belongings" said the man with harsh voice

Sam noticed the man tried to enter inside the room, but took a step back when he saw the salt line that was right in front of the door. If that man was possessed, anyone could be possessed as well. He had to save Jack, and he had to it fast. It was matter of time before the demon would manage to do something; anything to cross the salt line and take the kid away from him. They would use him to do bad things if they took him, or even worse. They could kill him if he denied cooperating with them.

Sam took an angel blade from the duffel bag and pulled Jack's arm towards him until the kid was behind him.

"Winchester… I have never met you, but I shouldn't have underestimated you. You, my friend, are smarter than I thought you'd be. Now… Give me the boy and I promise I will let you live" threated the demon with a cynical smile.

"What if I don't?" asked Sam, using his father's voice when he would get angry with him. He hated that tone of voice, but it usually worked pretty well when it came to intimidate some black-eyed-bitches.

"Well, you know the consequences… We will have fun with you. You can't escape, Sammy. There's at least ten of us in this motel. Ffifteen more down the road if by some miracle you manage to escape from our grasp. You can't kill us all, and that thing can't either. For what I heard, he's out of control. So, it's up to you. What's it gonna be then?" taunted the demon, calling the other ones to come and stand next to him.

Sam turned around and looked at Jack's scared face. The boy had to survive, even if he didn't.

"Jack, you have to go, now. Go to the point where the sun hides from the light" the hunter said in low voice.

"Sam, no! I won't leave you here" protested Jack, holding a firm grip onto Sam's jacket, not wanting to let go of him. He would not let Sam die. Too many people had died because of him already.

"Come on, Jack. You know the plan; you know what to do. I'll be ok" yelled Sam, pretending to be angry. The kid was scared of that tone of voice, so he had to use even if he felt guilty as hell.

The hunter saw Jack's teary eyes as he vanished in the thin air. The demons broke down the windows and pushed the salt away with the broken pieces of glass, making their way inside room. Sam took a step back, thinking how he would kill all the demons surrounding him. He was screwed and he knew that, but at least the kid was safe. He had talked to him about the emergency plan in case something would go wrong. For the first time ever, Sam felt like he had done something good. Because of him an innocent live could be saved. Jack knew every basic he had to in order to survive and protect himself. He would be fine without him.

"Where's the boy, Winchester? Where did he go, dammit!" yelled the demon, connecting his fist with Sam's jaw and kicking him in the stomach. Sam fell on his knees helplessly, feeling dizzy and out of breath.

Three men knelt in front of him and kept hurting him as he tried to fight back uselessly. He had been pinned to the ground when he heard the noise of his ribs being broken by them.

Sam did not say a word though. He decided to shut his mouth, not giving the demons the pleasure of hearing his screams. He had been through worse. He could manage this kind of pain.

The last word he said in a whisper was "Dee", then everything faded and he went limp on the floor as the demons tied him up and carried him away from the motel laughing aloud.

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Dean was driving in the silent car as held onto the steering wheel with more strength than needed. He had seen too many ways to punch/torture someone, and he couldn't wait to use those techniques on his dear little brother and the monster next to him once he found their pretty asses.

He could listen to music, since it always seem to help him, but since _that_ happened he just could not do it. Even if it sounded girly and stupid, the music he loved made him remember about his family and friends, the ones that died because of him. His mother liked the old classic rock as well, and he couldn't think about her without feeling sadness, guilt and anger. She had sacrificed herself _again_ for him and Sam, when she should have lived a nice life away from problems instead.

She had taken some decisions that were not the ones he thought she would at first, but she had done that because she thought about what was best for her children. He didn't hate her or held anything bad against her anymore. Her sacrifice for them had been the proof he needed to understand how much she had loved him and his little brother, even if they somehow they were still strangers to her. The kids she left on November 2nd, 1983 were not innocent anymore, and it was something difficult to understand.

He snapped back into the real world in a second when his cellphone vibrated. Dean answered thinking it was Garth. He was helping to find his little brother, but so far, there had been no luck from his side as well.

"Hello?" said Dean

"Dean? Is that you?"

Dean's heart stopped for a second as he heard the voice of an estrange man.

"My name is Richard, or this vessel's is at least. I have your little brother, thought you would want to know that. If you wanna see him alive, you'll have to give me the boy. Go to the Sunrise motel in California and look for him. If you don't find him within the next forty-eight hours, your dear Sammy will die"

The man ended the call moments later while Dean could hardly breathe.

"Dammit" whispered the elder hunter as he increased the speed of his beloved 'Baby'. He would find Jack. That little bastard could not be too far away, right?

 **TBC…**

 **Author's note** **: Hey guys! Here's another chapter to you! We have reached the interesting part of the story, right?**

 **Should I continue?**

 **Please review to let me know what you think** **J**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

 _"_ _Ready or not, here I come  
I'm so tired of this dumb game of hide and seek  
Olly olly oxen free  
Show yourself, you're scaring me  
Come out, come out, where ever you are  
You've taken this thing way too far"  
― __**Sonya Sones**_ _,_ _ **Stop Pretending: What Happened When My Big Sister Went Crazy**_

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Jack was still hiding in the spot Sam told him. It had been hours since he last saw Sam, and as time went by, his heart was beating faster and faster while adrenaline was pumping through his veins. He should have done something to protect him, anything. Sam was probably dead, there was no doubt of that. The worst part of being what he was, was that he could not die. Not with objects made by humans, angels or demons at least. He thought he would die when an angel stabbed him with its blade right in his chest, but it did not do anything at all. It slid like knife to butter, as well as the kitchen knife he stabbed himself with while being in his room. He just wanted to die and be with his mother and father. Was that too much to ask?

Would he go to heaven though? He was an abomination, and those kind of creatures went to… He did not remember the name, but he was sure it started with _Purga_ -something.

Why did he have to be a monster? Him of all people. It was not fair, but Sam said to him that crying over that would not do any good to his self-steem. Quoting his protector, he thought to himself _"You must embrace your darkness and fight for what is worth, Jack. I believe in you"_

Sam told him he was cursed as well, and as hard as it was to get over it, he accomplished his objective. A really big one, such as save the world with his brother more than one time. When Jack saw Sam, he could see the man he wanted to become someday. He was strong, but above all _a hero_. He often found himself asking himself why other people didn't know his name yet.

The hours kept passing and Sam had not given him any sign of life. He had to take the risk and go see if he was alright. He was not ready to do what humans did when they thought they lost somebody for the rest of their existence. He was not going to… Grieve him. Yeah, that was the exact word.

He made his way to the porch of the old house, speed walking as he watched the cars passing with high speed through the dusty road. After an hour of running non stop, he could understand why humans used cars to move around. His legs were hurting and his lungs seemed to be shutting down more and more each time he inhaled.

In the distance, he spotted what it seemed Dean's car. Perhaps he was hallucinating, but if he had learned something after everything he had been through, was to follow his instincts and opinions when needed. Jack was not going to let himself be used or kidnapped by anybody, specially by the enemies Sam and Dean had talked about. According to them, the world was a very dark place, and despite the fact he belonged to that section of it, he had to find the light inside of him. It was something he imposed to himself.

It turned out he was right. Dean was driving the Impala with a very angry face, the face he was scared of the most.

"Come in, now" Barked Dean, not even looking at him.

Jack hesitated for a moment, debating in his mind what Dean would do. He didn't know how to kill him yet, but he could physically hurt him though. He would not defend himself this time. He knew better than that.

"I am not telling you this again, kid. Sit that pretty ass of yours in the passenger seat right now or I swear to God…" threated Dean, his voice sounding bitter and bitter with each spoken word.

After Dean was done talking, Jack decided to obey and join him in the car. The Impala recover its speed as soon as he closed the door, while he felt the tension in the air. As he heard one human said once, he could cut it with a knife or something like that.

"Where's Sam?" asked the hunter playing the bad cop

"I- I left him in the motel like he asked me to! I wanted to help him, but he forced me to leave" said Jack with broken voice. The guilt was still eating his soul. He deserved to feel bad though, after all he was the one that caused this mess.

"You could have protected Sam, Jack. He is just a human, but you're not, so do us both a favor and stop pretending you are one of us" said Dean, giving him a death glare.

Jack wanted to say something, he wanted to apologize but he didn't know what to say. He had passed the limits this time. If Sam had been with Dean this would have never happened to him.

The rest of the car ride kept being as uncomfortable, until he found himself being alerted by the hunter's ice cold voice telling him to 'snap out of it'.

Dean got out of his baby first, waiting on Jack to do the same thing.

He felt a little guilty seeing the kid be scared of him, but he could not be good with Jack. Sam had been kidnapped because of him, and now he was the one cleaning the broken plates again.

He could have an open mind, in fact, he was still trying to accomplish that objective in his complicated life full of supernatural evil beings. He was not Sam, he was not affected by demon blood or was the result of a crazy night between a human and the devil himself. The darkness that were inside his brother and the kid was something he didn't actually want to think about. Sometimes ignoring some things made him happy, until they punched in the face and he had to think about them again. He was so damn tired of this life! He had hurt everyone he loved, and innocent people kept dying. Why was he even there if he did no good to the world? Perhaps he was the one thinking wrong, he was the real problem there. He had lost Bobby, his father, his mother, his grandfather, Jo, Ellen, Charlie and now possibly his brother. If he hadn't gone to Stanford to get Sam that night, everything would be different. Everybody would be alive and happy. He should have died instead of John. What is dead should stay dead, as he said to a kid many years ago.

Something had changed inside him. Something that was keeping him in the verge of giving up the strength he had been fight with for thirty years now.

 ** _We don't talk_**

 ** _We're not enough_**

 ** _And the storms slowly arise_**

 ** _When the light turns_**

 ** _And the cold terms arise_**

 ** _We were out and out, through the storms, through the night_**

 ** _We were running in the dark, we were following our hearts_**

 ** _And we would fall down and we would slowly fall apart_**

 ** _We would slowly fall into the dark_**

Hope had been the one that saved him every time he burned the corpse of a beloved family member or hunter friend. Hope to make the world a better place because that is what they would have wanted; hope to save as many people as he could and be the man he was taught to be. He never meant to hurt anybody, but somehow his job deviated from its original path and chaos replaced the trophies and thanful smiles. He could only see a bloody world tearing apart, seeing how it drowned deeper and deeper into the dark galaxy. Evil was winning, and this time, he may not be able to save it.

"Dean?" asked Jack, bringing him back to reality

"Let's go, we got work to do" said the elder Winchester, flinching slightly when he remembered how many times he had told the same line to his little brother.

Inside the motel room, everything was a mess. The window's glass was broken and spread on the ground, and the door was cracked. He kept inspecting the room until Jack called him. He turned around, alerted by the kid's preoccupied face.

That's when he saw it. The carpet was not red, therefore, that had to be blood. Even if it was the last thing Dean wanted to believe. What had those bastards done to Sammy? They would pay with their lives, but not fast. He would torture them the way he was tortured in hell, smiling at their pain and screams.

Jack kneeled to touch the dry blood, but Dean's mind focused on a little letter resting on the mattress nearest to the door. He could barely breathe as he opened it and read what it said.

The sentences had been written by one of the guys, and in the end a bloody fingerprint had been used to seal it. Sam's fingerprint.

"Dammit!" yelled aloud, punching a wall in the process. He could beat someone to death if he allowed himself to do it. Maybe that somebody could be Jack, but he had to be in a good shape to rescue his little brother. Not yet.

"Come on, Jack. We gotta go" ordered Dean, already heading towards the door

Once they were in the car, the kid asked to read the letter. Dean didn't want to, but he gave it to him anyway. Maybe that would make him realize that he had no other choice but to kill those guys or give himself in exchange for Sam. He was gonna get his little brother back no matter what. It was a freaking promise.

 **TBC…**

 **Author's note** **: Hey guys! Here's another chapter. Sorry for the lack of updates. I have had really low days lately. Please, let me know what you think if you have a minute. Reviews are appreciated** **J**


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

 _"_ _Rose: A real sacrifice is giving up something you want or enjoy very much, isn't it?  
Alec: Yes.  
Rose: Doing it one's own self because one loves another person very much and wants her to be happy?  
Alec: Yes.  
Rose: And doing it pleasantly, and being glad about it, and not minding the praise if it doesn't come?  
Alec: Yes dear, that is the true spirit of self-sacrifice..."  
_ _―_ _ **Louisa May Alcott**_

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNPSNPSNPSNPSNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN**

As Dean drove, Jack carefully began to open the letter to avoid breaking it because of the dry blood that was on it. The handwriting was not familiar to him, neither was the fingerprint. He had noticed how the elder brother stared at it when he first picked it, so he supposed it was Sam's fingerprint. It made sense if he thought about it.

His hands were shaky and sweaty, but he couldn't quite understand why until he started reading the terrifying letter.

It said:

 ** _"_** ** _Dean_**

 ** _So, it's no flash news to hear that we have your baby brother. I don't know if you knew this is happening, but a new kind of leader is raising in hell as I write this. He is better than Crowley ever was. His name is Asmodeus, just for you to know. You probably know what he wants by now, so I will just avoid the obvious part, right? The Nephilim vanished when we attacked him because of your dear little Sammy, therefore, baby brother paid the consequences. You must find that boy and bring him to us. We won't lose our time threating you. We know how much your brother means to you. I'll give you a call every few hours to make this game interesting. We will have a lot of fun with him! I have plenty of ways to make him suffer, just like Alastair taught us. Do you still remember those lessons? I bet you do!_**

 ** _Needless to say, if you don't find the Nephilim in two days, I'll enjoy watching Sammy bleed out like a pig._**

 ** _Clock's ticking, Dean. If I were you, I'd hurry up"_**

 ** _With love, Richard_** _"_

Jack looked away, suddenly feeling sick. He could feel Dean's eyes on him, but he did not turn his sight from the window. Sam was suffering and being hurt by those demons. Even if he had lost control of his powers while doing what he was supposed to do, he could have saved Sam.

The younger Winchester could have ended up with a… Concussion or a broken bone maybe, but it would have been better than the actual reality. He would trade himself for Sam, even if it was the last thing he would do.

"How many hours passed since he disappeared?" Asked Jack quietly, not really ready to hear the answer

"Ten hours and fifteen minutes" said Dean trying to be calm. His fingers had gripped onto the steering wheel like he depended on that to live. His knuckles had this scary white tone, filling the air with tension

"I'll trade myself for Sam, don't worry" reassured Jack, still not daring looking at him.

"Well, you were gonna, even if you didn't want to" barked the elder Winchester.

The silence came back to take the unsaid words, so Jack decided to stare at the trees at the side of the road, trying to pretend everything was fine. He had asked Dean why didn't he call the demons who captured Sam, but Dean had not answered. He would call them if he could, but trying to help the elder hunter would make everything worse. He missed Castiel, his real father. According to what Sam told him, he would know what to do. He would know how to talk to Dean to make him feel better. He just wanted Dean and Sam to be happy, so he would go with the bad guys and he would hurt them before he disappearing for the rest of their lives. Living alone was the best and only choice he had.

His eyes glowed in the darkness as he called his father's name, feeling a weird sound as a response. It felt like someone was there to hear his prayers. It didn't make sense. As Sam and Dean said the day he was born, what is burned never comes back. His mother would never come back, not even as a ghost. Castiel would never come back either, since he was somewhere that was not heaven or hell.

Before he could even process what was happening, he closed his eyes and fell asleep, seeing Cass's face in his dreams, smiling at him.

 _Spnspnspnspnpsnpsnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspn_

It felt like he was under the surface of the ocean. He could not breathe, and his limbs were paralyzed. His eyes remained closed as he started hearing unknown voices, male voices, if his brain still worked as it should.

"-far are we?" asked a man, who by his deep voice, seemed to be those tough guys that you would not dare to fight with

"Half an hour, sir" answered another male, his voice sounding higher.

He felt how he sank into the water one more time, losing awareness of his surroundings. He let the darkness take him one more time, just to be woken up when cold water moistened his clothes.

His heart started beating faster and his mind was still disoriented when a fist connected with his jaw.

"Wake up, Winchester" yelled one of the men

He tried to move his arms, but found out that there were bound behind his back. His senses came back to him, as he felt the chair he was tied to, plus the gag in his mouth. He could tell it was a dirty rag by the grey color of the fabric, that in the past had been white. Only God knew where that thing had been before it was put inside his mouth. Sam didn't have much time to think before the man spoke again with a smile on his face.

"Welcome back, Sammy. We thought you would sleep forever! How can you sleep so much and be a hunter at the same time? Dean should get rid of your ass as soon as possible" said one of the demons.

"Yeah. He should have done it a long time ago, when your daddy told him to do so, right?" whispered another demon into his hear, making him flinch as a response.

Sam could tell he was still disoriented. How could he had not felt the man from behind him?

"Hey, don't get scared Sammy! I thought that you'd be tougher, but I guess I was wrong. Just look at you. You look pale and beaten up. Why don't you be a good boy and tell us where your little Nephilim hides? We would still torture you, but we would go way easier on you, for your luck"

Sam mumbled something, so the demon took the gag off of him. As soon as Sam was free to exhale, he look at the demons in front of him.

"Screw you" answered Sam, giving them the best death glare he could.

"Did you hear that, Carl? Cause I think I heard the wrong answer"

"I think I heard the same thing, Cole" answered the demon, smiling while it took Sam's pocket knife from the table that was right next to him

Without a warning, Carl stabbed Sam in his leg, feeling how the adrenaline run through his veins while the hunter screamed his lungs out. He was enjoying this game too much, but he could not quite kill him yet. Their boss said to them that they needed him alive for now.

When Sam stopped screaming, the demon took his belt off and made a tourniquet above the wound to stop the bleeding. Sam omitted a cry of pain as he did so, making him smile even more.

"Well, as you can tell we will not accept those kind of answers, Sammy. Now, like I said, be a good boy and tell us where the fuck is Jack, would you?"

When Sam didn't answered, Cole stabbed his other leg. He just wanted this to be over, so he knew what to do. It had been almost twelve hours or so since the last call to Dean. Perhaps, if he called him and made him hear how much Sammy was suffering, he would hurry the fuck up!

"There's one thing you don't know about, Sam. I left a note before we left the motel room. Dean has been warned to look for Jack, so he is going to bring him to us like it or not. The thing is that he believes we will let you go… Just to be clear, not you or Dean will walk off of here. I will enjoy cutting your throats! You have no idea… Now, shall we call big bro and let him know how much his baby brother is suffering?" asked Cole as he pressed the call button.

Sam knew that Dean would answer that call, but he wish he wouldn't. Dean didn't have to die because of him. No one had to die anymore. If Jack and Dean could walk out of this problem, the pain he was in didn't matter. He would gladly go to hell for the people he loved. The blood loss made him be dizzy, but he was fighting his best to stay awake and alert.

"Dean! It's nice to hear from you! You find Richard's letter?"

"Don't be mean, Dean. I think Sammy wants to talk to you- Hang on"

Sam's eyes were half closed when a needle prodded the skin of his neck. One second later, his throat felt like it was on fire, but it didn't stop there. The fire kept spreading to the rest of his body, making him tense the bindings that held him prisoner. He tried to shut his mouth and be strong for Dean, but at that moment it seemed impossible. He never heard the laugh of the two demons in the room, or the voice screaming from the other side of the phone, that kept calling his name, worried sick about him.

 **TBC…**

 **Author's note:** Hey guys! Here's the requested update you asked for. I feel a little bit mean today, so I enjoyed making Sam suffer a little. Hope you don't mind ;)

If you want me to continue this story, please let me know what you think J

See ya soon!


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

 _ **Bryan Mills**_ _: I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don't have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills, skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you._

 _ **Marko**_ _: [after a long pause] Good luck_

\- **_Taken_**

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNPSNPSN**

Dean looked at the kid next to him, suddenly remembering the old times when he and Sam were busy looking for their father all around the country, joking with each other and not being aware about the evil creatures that were yet to see, or even the plans that angels and demons had for both of them.

It felt so good back then to be a hunter, not worrying over the son of Lucifer itself sleeping right by his side. He could tell that he had seen everything now though. It was something that, if he was lucky, would tell Sam's children in a future, seeing their surprised faces with each story told. He wanted Sam to have a life, to have a reason to live that weren't only him. Their bond they shared was stronger than every siblings bond he had seen, however, he loved and always would love every step of the way while Sam were by his side.

It was simple. Sam & Dean. Dean & Sam.

There was no one else than mattered to him. Not even in the rough times, when they were apart for months. He cared about him, some days more than usual after having nightmares of him being hurt..

He was not aware of the little smile on his face, at least until he felt his cell phone vibrating. He placed the phone against his ear and listened while his heart was beating faster than ever the voice in the background of the man that had taken Sam.

He knew he would call. If someone asked him how he knew, he wouldn't be able to explain it. Perhaps it was one of those big brother freaky things, or that kind of 'I am too used to see Sam in danger' crap he was tired of. He couldn't tell which one was the one that won this time.

All he knew was that he would save him and kick some asses for a change.

"I am gonna kill you, you son of a bitch! If Sam is not in one piece, I swear to God I will end you" threatened Dean, using his father's voice. His hand held tightly onto the steering wheel, thinking that it was the demons' throats.

"Dean! It's nice to hear from you! You find Richard's letter?"

"I have the Nephilim here with me, just like youwanted to. I want a direction to meet and get my brother back. I am not asking. You all are gonna die! I am gonna make sure of that" answered Dean, bitterly and about to explode.

"Don't be mean, Dean. I think Sammy wants to talk to you- Hang on" said the demon.

He didn't know what to expect, or perhaps he did, however, what he heard was heartbreaking. Sam was being tortured and he could tell he was too weak to pretend that whatever was happening there was not that painful. The worst part was that he couldn't do anything about it. He was helpless.

"Sammy!" yelled Dean from his useless position in the problem both Winchesters were in.

He continued to yell until Sam stopped screaming. For a moment he thought the demons had killed him, but then he thought about their plans. Sam needed to be alive. Even if they wanted to kill him. He needed to be at least barely breathing for them to be useful. Despite what had happened to his little brother, he would be okay soon.

"What the hell did you do to him, you son of a bitch?!" yelled Dean, not aware that Jack was now paying attention with his eyes open and teary eyes staring at the phone against his ear.

"Oh, you mean the reason why he screamed like a baby? We injected something into him. According to what we were told, they say it is meant to torture demons. Since your brother has demon blood in him, we thought about trying it on him. Let me tell you though. Your brother is not quite human. I would let him die if I were you" said the demon while staring at Sam's unconscious form.

He was covered in sweat and even his face expression didn't seem relaxed at all. He was probably still in pain, and would be for a couple of minutes, before the next method of torture would be used on him.

Before Dean could answer with another threat or curse, the demon ended the call.

He thought he would have no other information, when a text message was sent to him. On it, it was written the direction to meet.

Finally, he would get his brother back. He was gonna end them all for once.

"Dean-" started Jack

"Don't bother to apologize or talk in general, kid. I am not in the mood right now" said Dean, avoiding the eye contact.

"I can take them down and disappear from your lives. I won't be evil, Dean. Sam believes in me, and my mother did too before I was born on this Earth. I have to do it for Sam. I will eliminate them" said Jack

Dean didn't say anything, but stared at the kid for a couple of seconds.

"What can you do, Jack?" asked Dean. He didn't want to hear him, but if he didn't pay attention to him, the kid would not stop talking. Sometimes some sacrifices had to be made, right?

Jack started to explain everything he could do and had practiced with Sam until the day he was taken from him. To be honest, Dean was quite impressed.

He knew how Sam felt about himself when it came to think m about his powers, and now he did understand why he did what he did. At least more than he did the last time they had seen each other.

If Jack could save Sam, he was good. Perhaps Sam was right, and he could be saved. Sam had made mistakes, and those mistakes had made him think about him as a kid that had no voice in the matter. Things had changed, and so had Sam. He had hurt his little brother, and that was something he would never forgive himself.

"Dean? You ok?" asked Jack

"Yeah, kiddo. Everything's gonna be okay" answered Dean.

"Dean! Look out!" yelled the Nephilim.

The elder hunter barely had time to stop the car, just in time to avoid hitting on a limp body in the middle of the road.

When braking so suddenly, his body jerked forward, same as Jack's. The kid hit his head against the window, and he almost went through to the same process. He opened his eyes and moved his arms and legs. He was okay, or so he thought. His whole body would hurt ina matter of hours, but he could not care about that for now. It didn't take him too long to realize that his baby had been affected though. Why did she have to suffer and be broken?

Dean looked at Jack first, and then got out of his beloved Impala. The body was still in the same position, though it seemed familiar. The trench coat was covered by dust and the man's eyes were closed.

"Cass?" asked Dean aloud, not hearing the footsteps from behind him. He was dead. How could be there? It made no sense.

"Father?" asked Jack, confused and happy. His father was back, or was he?

 **TBC…**

 **Author's note** **: Should I continue? Please, leave me a review if you have a minute. Reviews are love** **J**


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

 _"He steps away from her, going to a little side table and removing a cloth that's lying on top. Underneath are severale shiny bits of metal. Mr. Hammar picks one up._

 _"And now for the second part of our interview", he says, approaching the woman._

 _Who starts to scream_

 _― Patrick Ness, The Ask and the Answer_

SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPN

Sam's senses came back as he felt what now he was used to. Torture and pain.

"Winchester! Wake up, or I'll use the cattle prod right now!" yelled one of the men angry.

Sam heard other angry voices too, but he was still disoriented and couldn't focus on anything. He didn't even try opening his eyes, since he felt the room spinning around him already;his body was also threathing to puke his last meal. The men had stopped the bleeding gashes of his legs, however, he still felt his body on fire from whatever the demons had injected on him. Somehow, it reminded him when he was drinking demon blood, but that had been painless. He had felt the power of it inside him, making him stronger, or so he had thought at the time. If he had demon blood in his sistem, he could have easily taken care of the demons himself, however, he was not that monster anymore. The trials cleaned his system a long time ago.

"So, Sam, you gonna collaborate, or you want us to keep having fun? Personally talking, I don't mind the second option, but we need the kid and I am losing my patience, you know?" said one of the demons, walking around him, holding a metalic object that Sam could not see, but could hear by the sound it made when it contacted with the man's hand.

In fact, it was a crowbar. It had blood from other people, but the demons didn't seem to mind about that. Every single drop of dry blood on it was like a memory of the hunters they had tortured to get to Sam Winchester. Despite the fact that the other demons had told them that they were not good enough to find him, there they were, with the young hunter tied up and suffering right in front of their own eyes. It was quite a victory. More than that, it was what would make them the leaders of their own demon army if their king wanted to reward them with anything they wanted.

"You'll never find him" said Sam, slowly picking up the pieces of his messed up brain.

"Dean will give us that kid, don't worry about that. You would do the same thing if Dean were in your pretty worn out shoes now, Sammy" mentioned of the demons.

"Don't call me like that, you bastard. Only De-"

Sam didn't get to finish what he wanted to say, since the demon with the crowbar hit him in his stomach, seconds later hitting him on his chest several times until he heard one of his ribs break. He could not shut his mouth, even though he wished he could have done that. The scream pierced through his ears, n¡being so loud that he could barely hear the demons laughing; their faces expressing joy and exciment. For them, it was like being a child in Disneyland. Even the strongest and toughest men had broke when it came to their torture sessions. Sam was not gonna be the exception.

"You'll-Jack will kill you all" Sam coughed the words, feeling his whole body trembling. He could barely breathe, and the taste of blood on his mouth was not exactly a good sign. He'd been beaten before, but now he was pretty sure he had a punctured lung. If so, he was not gonna live to tell the story.

It was matter of time before his condition would get worse, so he decided to lie to the demons. If Dean would really come as the demons said, he wanted to see him one last time. He knew that Jack could take care of all those black eyed sons of bitches. If he died, there was no deal that could be done. It was the end for him. He and his brother had fought with each other, but so had loved and taken care of each other. If he could say he was sorry and promise him that he would take care of Jack, he would die in peace.

"Wait- I'll talk, please" said Sam, still coughing, feeling that soon he would pass out.

The demon with the crowbar was about to hit him again, when the other one stopped him.

"Stop, you idiot. He has to say something, right Sam?"

Sam nodded slowly as he spitted some of the blood inside his mouth.

"I know how you can summon him, but you gotta leave Dean out of this. I can make him help you" said Sam, hoping that the demons bit the lie.

The room went silent as everyone stared at Sam.

"If that kid hurts any of us, you will see your brother be tortured in front of your pretty green eyes, you hear me? I know that he is your biggest weakness, Sammy, so please, keep speaking before my friend here hits you again, shall we?

Sam nodded again as his plan worked. If he succeded, the spell would make them vanish away from where he was, buying hiim some time to escape and ask for help.

 **TBC...**

 **Author's Note** **: Hi guys! Sorry for the long time with no update. I have been feeling up and down with depression and anxiety. It's a short chapter, but at least it is something. Please, let me know if you want me to keep writing this story. See ya soon!**


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

 _"_ _Home is where you go to find solace from the ever changing chaos, to find love within the confines of a heartless world, and to be reminded that no matter how far you wander, there will always be someone or something waiting when you return."_ _  
_ _―_ ** _Kendal Rob_**

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPSNSPNSPNSPNSPN**

 ** _THEN…_**

 _"Dean! Look out!" yelled the Nephilim._

 _The elder hunter barely had time to stop the car, just in time to avoid hitting the limp body in the middle of the road._

 _When braking so suddenly, his body jerked forward, same as Jack's. The kid hit his head against the window, and he almost went through to the same process. He opened his eyes and moved his arms and legs. He was okay, or so he thought. His whole body would hurt in matter of hours, but he could not care about that for now. It didn't take him too long to realize that his baby had been affected though. Why did she have to suffer and be broken?_

 _Dean looked at Jack first, and then got out of his beloved Impala. The body was still in the same position, though it seemed familiar. The trench coat was covered by dust and the man's eyes were closed._

 _"Cass?" asked Dean aloud, not hearing the footsteps coming from behind him. He was dead. How could be there? It made no sense._

 _"Father?" asked Jack, confused and happy. His father was back, or was he?_

 ** _NOW…_**

The silence remained intact as Dean stared at Cass' limp body. He had burned his vessel when Lucifer killed him months ago, yet, there he was again, unconscious and, if he was not hallucinating, breathing again in slow and soundless puffs. It was barely visible, however, he had been trained to recognize the smallest sign of movement and breathing pattern when he was just a child, while hunting with his father. It had not been easy, but now he could say he had the eyes of the tiger, seeing Sam's bitch face every time he said that old joke. Apparently, his little brother didn't share his sense of humor since birth.

"Dean, what's happening?" asked Jack, still unsure of walking towards the angel.

Dean did not answer, since he had, suddenly, nothing to say, not even a bitter comment to tell Jack how bad he had screwed things up.

Jack made an attempt to get closer to Castiel, but Dean stopped him before he could even take a second step.

"Don't get near him. We don't know if it's him or someone pretending to be him" said Dean, feeling weird as his protective instincts kicked in again. He swore to himself that he would hate that kid forever, although, things seemed to be changing as time went by. Perhaps it was the pure need of protecting somebody, since he didn't have Sammy with him at the moment. Many years ago, when he agreed with Sam's plan of jumping to the pit, he felt physical and mental pain. Slowly but surely, that same unbearable pain turned into a silent voice that lived within his head, being forced to back up when he knew he had to pretend that everything was okay while being around neighbors and the little foster family that he borrowed.

Seeing his little brother closing his eyes, letting himself go, sacrificing his life for the world was the toughest thing he had ever seen him done, leaving him alone. It was then when he ran from the hunting life for the first time ever, despite the words that he heard John saying to him over and over again, as if he was that brave, but scared kid that could not disagree with his father, idolizing him like he had never done with anybody. The relationship that he had had with him had been complicated, but he still loved him. It took a couple more years for Sam to understand that John had done the best he could, but he did it eventually. Closing his eyes, he heard John whispering those stupid words again…

 _"_ _Watch out for Sammy"_

 _"_ _Don't let him get hurt"_

 _"_ _You're a big boy now, Dean. Sammy needs you to be safe"_

 _"_ _If something happens to him while he's under your watch you'll never forgive yourself, and you know it. I trust that you will be there to protect him no matter what happens"_

Lisa and Ben became his safe place for an entire year. He felt guilty for letting John and Sam down,(again), but he had made a promise to his little brother, and he intended to keep it until Sam, or Robo-Sam showed up, knocking the cardboard house off of its main base. That was the end of his relationship with Lisa, going back to the old roads he considered familiar, driving his precious baby with Sammy and, sometimes, Cass by his side.

Since then, and until the incident he had had, involving Lisa being possessed, he started thinking of them as a beautiful dream.

Dean had always had the need to protect somebody, especially when the world needed help because of the mess he and brother caused. Now Jack was the one that, somehow, needed to be guided and followed around. He could do that, right? He owed that to Sam.

Without a warning, Cass' body began to move, suddenly sitting on the dirty road, looking at the sky like a child watching the stars for the very first time. His hands began to touch the pavement, his trench coat and his chest.

It was when he turned around that he saw Dean and Jack, standing up.

"Dean? Is that you?" asked the angel with his raspy voice, confused and fearing this was a trick of the creature that ruled in the empty. Maybe it had brought him back because he was, as Dean and Sam said, persistent and stubborn when he wanted to.

Dean wanted to talk, to do something, anything, however, his mouth was dry and his hands were sweaty.

He had been optimistic about the good in this world many years ago, but now he was just used to find evil and death anywhere he went to. Luck was not on their side, so why would the situation change now?

"Father, is that you?" persisted Jack, forgetting Dean's presence, passing him, running towards the angel without any doubt or alert in his body that that move could go wrong.

"Jack?" said Cass, looking at him surprised. In his mind, the son of Kelly was a newborn child, not an eighteen-year-old man.

Cass wrapped his arms around the Nephilim without thinking twice about it, letting all the fears and doubts vanish in the thin air. It was true. At least it felt true. He was back. Jack was safe

"Cass,I- What the hell is happening?!" asked Dean aloud; his confusion turning into desperation and a little bit of anger.

"I- I am not entirely sure about what has happened, however, it seems that I have been killed and brought back to life" announced the angel, still holding Jack as tight as he could.

"I burned your body, I mean… What do you mean you were brought back to life? Who the hell did it? No one can do that. We tried everything, but it didn't work. I called G-Chuck for help, but he didn't answer. Me and Sam thought that you were gone for good" replied Dean, suddenly feeling sick. Everything that was happening was too much for him to carry.

"I would like to explain everything that happened, but I am not sure if I will be able to put it into words… Where's Sam?" asked Cass

"Sam's- Sam is not here… He's been kidnapped by demons. It's my fault, Castiel. I am so sorry" apologized Jack, with teary eyes and a sad face.

Dean explained everything that happened between Sam, him and Jack. Castiel, as usual, stood in silence, analyzing the situation, trying to find a way to get Sam back.

"I can help. Jack, you can help us too. We just need a plan" said Cass

"No shit, Sherlock. Come on, get in the car you two. We've got work to do" said Dean, walking towards the Impala.

As the three men sat in the Impala's leather seats, hope started to rise from the darkness. Team Free Will 2.0 was now born.

 **TBC…**

 **Author's note: Hey guys! I know it's been a long time without an update, but I promise you that I am doing everything I can to write each chapter. College is killing me, plus my depression and anxiety reach the roof now…**

 **Anyway, hope you enjoyed the chapter. If you can, please leave a review. It would mean the world to me. Until the next update! Take care!**

 **J**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

 _"DON'T YOU DARE DIE ON ME, JEZEBEL! DON'T YOU DARE! Or I'll follow you to the next world and KILL you."_

 _― L.J. Smith, Huntress_

spnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspnspspn

 **NOW...**

While Castiel and Jack were fighting the demons in the room, throwing punches and using their angel grace to destroy them, Dean was busy on the one job he had on this Earth. Keep, or try to keep, better said, Sammy alive. The deep gash on his stomach was bleeding more than he had ever seen in his years as a hunter, and he didn't need to be a doctor to know that the situation was not good. The blood was, somehow, staining his clothing as well, as he almost dragged his brother through the dirty and bloody four walls sorrounding them.

"Sammy, come on man, we need to get the hell out of here and seek for a real doctor. I' won't let you fall, but you need to walk a little bit farther for me, okay?" asked Dean with gentle voice, holding Sam by passing a hand through his armpit and the other one above his injuried stomach, pretty much supporting the dead weight of his little brother's giant body. Through the years he had wondered how a kid that ate salad and fruit every day could be so heavy, but now he could not focus on that. Sam was trying to keep pressure on the wound, however, his strenght was failing him.

While walking, Sam started coughing blood through his mouth, and slowly, close his eyes. He could feel it. Even though he wanted to believe that he would be able to tell the story , he knew he was going to die. There was too much blood on his hands and the piece of clothing that was making pressure on his waist. The feeling of numbness in his body was too much to even concentrate of the little spark of hope that he and his brother seemed to find in the worst moments of their lives, even when they were all beat up and tired. Dean was talking to him, or so he thought, but he could not understand what he was saying. His legs failed him again, almost falling to the ground limp, white as a hospital bed sheet. He could still feel Dean's tense body holding him, forcing him to take uncoordinated steps as he tried to keep his mouth shut, trying to be be strong for his elder brother. Every single move seemed to be happening in slow motion, as if was just a dream. The feeling reminded him of Cold Oak, where he died, stabbed by Jake. Death was calling him again, and this time there was nothing Dean could do to bring him back. He knew how hard it felt to live without each other, wasting oxygen when other people needed it. A few seconds passed, and he felt some kind of weird peaceful feeling, despite the fear of not being anymore on Earth to fight along with his brother. What would Dean do this time? He even wondered what would happen to his room. Yes, he knew that it was not something that he should be asking to himself at the moment, but he could imagine his elder brother keeping everything like he had left it before leaving the bunker, or drinking outside the door of it. He knew his brother too well, so he didn't even had to think about it twice. That would happen, like it or not.

When the younger hunter could no longer keep himself together, fell to the floor, hearing his brother's screams, his hands trying to grab him again, failing at supporting that weight back again.

"-C'mon man! Sammy, don't you dare die on me, you hear me? SAM! SAMMY!"

"Dee" said Sam in low voice, barely aware of the fight that was going on a few feet behind him. When his lips parted, he felt the metalic taste of blood again. He wanted to say so many things to Dean before closing his eyes, many things that they rarely said because of the way they grew up. John told them that hunters were not supposed to be emotional and weak. They had to be strong, sharp, obedient and smart. Sam covered the smart part since he started hunting, and Dean was the one that always followed the rules, no matter what happened. He was the good soldier, the son that John had wanted him to be like too.

Now, many years later after his father's death, he understood him when he said those wise words to them. Having emotions only put him and the ones he loved in trouble, but he could not manage them as he would like to. Maybe it was a trial that destiny, God, or whoever ruled the world put in the way to remind them how screwed up he and his brother were. Dean was the most important person he had in his life. Of course, Bobby, John, Jo and Charlie's death had been hard on both Winchesters. Losing someone always hit them harder than other ones, since they knew what did it. The rest of the people only thought about the medical causes, not aware of what was out there when the sun went down. All those poeple were lucky. For nine years he had had that innocence, despite the questions that his elder brother would not answer, no matter how many times he asked them.

"Dee, 'm s-sorry" said Sam, suddenly feeling too tired to keep his eyes open.

"Stay here, okay? Keep your eyes open while I go get the car. I am gonna come back for you, I promise you that" said Dean, denying the bad feeling in his gut that something bad was gonna happen. Sam HAD to be okay. It was his freaking job, and he was gonna make sure that that happened.

"S-Stop Dee... 'm seeing her" murmured the younger Winchester, slightly smiling at Jess, who was calling his name from the distance. Her curly hair was as blonde as he had seen it before going to find his dad with Dean, and the Smurfs shirt, that he bought for her, smelled like roses, just like he remembered. Jess always used a fragrance that he loved. He wanted to stay, but another part of him started to follow the smell of roses that Jess left behind.

"NO! SAMMY, PLEASE, STAY WITH ME MAN! SAMMY, 'M BEGGING YOU, DAMMIT!" yelled Dean, holding Sam, as if he could somehow keep him alive. Sam's head was lolling and out of control as his body was getting colder and even paler than before.

Dean started shaking Sam's body desperately with one hand as he applied pressure on the wound with his other one. When Sam closed his eyes and body went limp, he just knew it, even if he was not gonna admit it.

Sam could not be dead. He was supposed to be the one that saved him from those demons and bring him home again. They were supposed to have a long talk that involved saying "Sorry" in the Winchester way, ending the day with a cold beer and watch some Netflix as they often did when they were not hunting or they were out of plans to get their mother back, trying to distract their minds from the fact that they had been cursed since the very first moment they took their first breaths.

Dean checked for a pulse, closing his eyes as a single tear slid down his face. There was no pulse. Sam was dead. Sammy was fucking dead.

The elder hunter leaned Sam's body on the floor, pulled his knife out of his pocket and murmured to his brother

"I am gonna come back, Sammy. I am sorry, so freaking sorry"

The Dean Winchester that Castiel and Jack knew was not the one that they saw as soon as he entered inside the room. He hardly looked at them, walking towards one of the demons that were fighting with Cass.

"You freaking SON OF A BITCH!" yelled, stabbing it many times, even after he was no longer alive. He had stabbed Sammy, and he had witnessed it. He should have known that the demon had a knife. Why was he so stupid?

When all the demons were dead, the two angels and elder hunter walked towards Sam's still body. Once his body was lying down on the backseat,his head resting on Jack's legs, the Impala drove away. No one said anything, but they didn't need to. Now they had to find a way to save Sam, if that was even possible.

 **TBC...**

 **Author's note** **: Hey guys! I know that I have not been really updating my fics, but I am really busy :( Hopefully this chapter is enough for a while...**

 **Anyway, please, let me know what you think about this chapter and if you want me to do the last one... Will Sam come back to life? Who will bring him back if so?**

 **See ya soon! Love u :)**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

 _"The dead could only speak through the mouths of those left behind, and through the signs they left scattered behind them."_

 _― Robert Galbraith, The Cuckoo's Calling_

 **SPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSPNSSPNSPNSPN**

"I remember that one time when you were nine years old and you still believed in Santa Claus... Dad would leave us in motel rooms for days without coming back, even during Christmas, or New Year Eve... You'd ask me when he would come back; you would me ask if Santa would give you what you asked for. Sammy, I hated to lie to you, I always did, but every time a lie left my mouth, I finally got to see that happy and excited face of yours staring back at me with hope, so I could not let you down just yet... I'd say dad was gonna come back to us to celebrate Christmas, and explain how stupid Santa read all the letters that were sent to him, including yours... When you turned ten, dad told me that you had to grow up, meaning I had to let you get hurt by reality in order to do so..." murmured Dean, staring at the still,cold, and pale dead body that was once his brother, his green eyes never leaving Sammy for more than a few seconds to see if a shadow could be seen on the other side of the door while he talked to his brother's corpse. It had been twenty-eight hours since Sam was murdered, but he was too in shock to see the signs of a decomposing body. His pink lips were now deep purple, his skin was grey and not soft anymore, but the total opposite. His cheeks were sunken and his tall body was skinnier than usual.

Dean could not see that or smell the odor coming from his brother's body, because he could only the focus on the beauty in him, even if life had already abandoned him. He saw those curly eyelashes he always teased his brother about when they were younger, he saw those big hands of his, remembering the times his little brother stitched him, so he wouldn't bleed out after a hunt went sideways. His arms were now resting on each side of his body, rigid as a damned rock. He wanted to touch his left wrist, check if he had a pulse. Dean wanted to hold his brother one more time, tell him all the stories he never did, even though Sam asked to hear them when he was twelve years old or so.

 _"Dean, did... mom sing a lullaby to me when I was a baby?"_

 _"Dee, you think she loved me like she loved you?"_

 _"Dean, do you remember something about her?"_

Sam stopped asking about her after the elder sibling yelled at him and threatened to tell his mistakes while hunting to their father. When Sam was eighteen, a few days before he left for Stanford, he asked something similar, insisting one more time...

 _"Dean, do you think we will ever get to have a normal life like mom did?"_

 _"What?... Sam, we talked about this. Innocent people are dying as we speak, and it's our job to look after them. We will never have a normal life. Deal with it" said Dean bitterly, wishing his brother would stop complaining about their lives._

 _"But De-"_

 _"Drop it, Sam! I've had enough of you and your stupid questions" answered the elder sibling_

 _A minute passed and the boys did not say a word to each other. Dean was pissed, but so was Sam. He would not tolerate to be treated like a child again. He had recieved the letter from Stanford that day, so he had to test Dean to know how his reaction would be when he told him he was quiting the hunting life to have a safe one. Needless to say, his older brother was not gonna accept the idea of him leaving for good to become a lawyer. John wouldn't either, but he knew he had to go._

 _"Mom would want us to be happy, you know? She would want us to have a normal life, the life she could not have" murmured the younger hunter_

 _Sam's words hit Dean in the gut, and dammit, they hurt like hell. He knew that too. He knew Mary wanted them to be happy, but their father became obsessed with hunting the thing that killed her to the point where he wanted to kill it too, even if it was the last thing he did. He was not happy neither, but he was not bitching about it._

 _Without thinking twice about it, Dean punched Sam in the face, rage consuming his entire body. He did not mean to do it, but he was done with Sam's attitude. That kid needed to grow up and stop saying the wrong things._

 _He felt guilty but kept a neutral face and did not say a word as Sam left the motel room to take a walk. The elder brother knew he chose to take that long walk to clear his mind, so he wouldn't end up beating the crap out of him. Sammy wouldn't come to the motel until night, drunk and tired. Little did Dean know, his days with Sam by his side were counted._

"I'm sorry Sammy. You had the right to know everything. I was just trying to protect you from pain, but I didn't know how to do it properly" said Dean, this time, not daring to look at him. Sam had never had a normal life before Stanford, and whenever he questioned about Mary or something other kids did, such as practising a sport, he shut the door in front of him. The truth was that John and Dean kept Mary for themselves, trying to keep their memories of her intact. Sam did not remember her, since he was just a baby when the fire killed her. Sam had all the right to know her, and when they got her back, she vanished in the thin air again, leaving them heartbroken.

He could imagine Sam waking up again, stretching his sore body, moving it towards Dean, being happy to see him again, forgetting the fight they had a few weeks ago. The truth was far from what he almost hallucinated though. Sam walked out that door when he said that his little brother was just another monster, not knowing that he would never get the chance to say he was so fucking sorry! Sam was lying down in Dean's mattress, mainy because Sam never liked his own one. In his room, there were just a small computer, a notebook, some pens and some other books he liked to read when they didn't work on a hunt. Sammy's room was just another empty space of the bunker. On the other side, Dean's room was full of their old guns, photos of his family, some adult stuff he used when feeling "bored", and many things he did not care about right now. All that mattered was his brother, or what was left of him anyway.

There was a deep wound on his brother's stomach and many lacerations everywhere, which he could not cure off. Castiel wanted to heal his wounds, but Dean did not want anyone to touch his baby brother's body if it wasn't necessary. He had taken care of Sammy since he was a Rugrat, so he could still do it , even if he were not breathing any longer, right? It was just a small act he chose to do because it was too late to save him now. Thinking about that hurt him in every single way possible, so he rubbed his hands together and covered his face with them to try relax his tense body. He was warm, but his baby brother was ice cold. It was not fair. He should have been the one that died, not Sammy. Somehow, Dean was always hurting the people he loved the most.

"You would probably kick me if you'd seen me bathing this big body of yours, man. I had to clean all that blood though, you know? I swear that you got me soaked and that's never a good thing. I'll probably get sick, but I don't care about my health, I won't if you are not around to take care of my stupid ass. You always managed to take care of me, even in the smallest ways, with gentle words, still insisting when I tried to ignore you, you were always there, never judging me for what I did or said... I-I should've- I'm so so-" Dean could not finished the sentence, since he started to sob aloud,losing the control of his feelings, his teary eyes blurring the world. Maybe that was better than seeing everything in High Definition. Yeah, it was much better,but he could not cry for too long. He had to act like everything was okay and "believe" the lies Cass would told him. It was a Winchester thing after all. He had to be strong for Sam, for Jack. He lost his fatherly figure when Sam died, and he knew how that felt like.

 **"It's gonna be okay, Dean. We will get him back, you know that, right?"**

 **"Dean, we are trying to contact a witch that may help us find a solution to bring Sam back"**

 **"Dean, don't loose hope,-"**

 **"Dean, we are here you if you ever-"**

And so it kept going, just like a freaking broken recording machine that always played the same sound over and over again. He was tired of Cass' stupid pep talk, so he decided to lock himself in his room and be with Sam. He would not drink, eat or sleep until Sam did so too. He deserved that and more. He was sure Sam would do the same, even if he would want him to take care of himself for a minute instead of sitting next to his dead body. Again, it was a Winchester thing. A painful tradition they learned through many deaths and broken hearts.

Hours passed without mercy,Cass kept making contact with angels, witches or demons for help, and Dean kept sobbing until he fell asleep without meaning to. A knock on the door woke him up two hours later though. His whole body was covered in sweat, probably because he had a dream with his brother. He could see him with that big smile of his, laughing with some old Stanford friends in a crowded bar. He called his name, but Sam could not hear him. He tried calling him louder, but nothing happened. When Dean got tired and walked towards him, he realized he could not even touch him. Sam was a ghost, a memory of the happy man he had been, before he went to pick him up at college and ruined everything. Sam was gone for good. SAMMY WAS DEAD.

"Dean!" yelled Cass from the other side of the door, desperate to see the elder Winchester. He was worried sick about him, since he was not talking, eating or sleeping anymore. It almost seemed that he wanted to die too, to see his younger brother one more time. He lost many brothers and sisters as well, so he knew the pain he was going through. Gabriel was the one closer to him while growing up. He protected him and took care of him when no one else did.

Sometimes, angels and human beings had problems with accepting the nature of Death and its consequences. He had to take care of Dean, because that was what Sam would want him to do. Jack wanted to do it too, but he told the Nephilim to stay away from the elder brother for a few days, until Dean accepted the reality he was living. It was quite heartwarming how much Jack reminded him of Sam, sometimes moving like he used to. He was innocent, he wanted to be good and the words he said were spoken with true kindness. Jack cared about the world, tried to help everyone instead of himself, cause he felt he would never be good enough to anyone. It was something Sam had felt and done many times in the past.

He would be by Jack's side no matter what. Kelly and Sam believed in him,but so did he, since the very first moment he touched Kelly's belly.

According to what Jack talked about Sam, he had good memories of him, being a fatherly figure to his broken soul when he needed him the most.

Cass was too lost in his thoughts to see Dean opening the door. The elder hunter was a mess. His eyes were swollen from crying, his lips were bloody cause he kept biting them when feeling anxious, and the spark of happiness in his eyes was gone.

The angel attempted to say something to Dean, but before he had the chance to open his mouth, Dean closed the door in his face and locked it.

Cass decided that he would focus on the angel radio inside his mind for now, until Dean would come out when nature called, as he would say. Sam would not stay dead for long.

"Castiel, come here!" yelled Jack

Cass ran towards the Nephilim, feeling panick consuming him. He thought something was wrong, but what Jack said in response made him smile. There was a way to bring Sam back. The only problem was that they needed one item that didn't have.

They needed Archangel grace. If they wanted to bring Sam back, they would have to find Lucifer...

 **TBC...**

 **Author's Note: Hey guys! Sorry for the long time without an update. If you still want me to continue this story, please review :) See ya soon!**


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